After learning about UrAI.com from a blog I frequently read: Modeled Behavior, I decided to run my own blog through the system and see what it says.

jackpo.org is probably written by a male somewhere between 66-100 years old. The writing style is academic and happy most of the time.

Now really? I had no idea I was such a cherry person.. and age 66 – 100? WTF…

ABC News is reporting that Viagra could be the potential cure to jet lag:

Perhaps Viagra Can Soften Jet Lag’s Impact

Erectile Dysfunction Drug Shows Promise in Animal Study

By JOSEPH BROWNSTEIN, ABC News Medical Unit

May 21, 2007 —

The little blue pill known for making time in the bed more enjoyable may also help weary jet travelers roll out of it in the morning.

New research shows Viagra may be the solution for travelers who suddenly find themselves needing to rise hours earlier as they cross time zones, at least if those travelers are hamsters.

A study at the Universidad Nacional de Quilmes in Buenos Aires showed that male hamsters who received an injection of sildenafil along with a 15-minute stimulation of light were able to adjust their internal clocks by six hours in roughly half the time that hamsters who did not receive the treatment took.

…

You might notice some very amusing headings:

• Rise and Shine
• Study Arouses Interest
• Will Results Stand Up to Scrutiny

That’s right, my college roommate Joseph Brownstein is now reporting for ABC News! Congratulations Joe, I expect a lot more hilarity to come!

Straight from Jim Zhuang @ Google China comes one of the more hilarious education fraud stories that has come across my IM window.

IMPOSTER CAUGHT

High school graduate pretends to be a Stanford student, even living in the dorms, buying textbooks and ‘studying’ for exams

Azia Kim was like any other Stanford freshman. She graduated from one of California’s most competitive high schools last June, moved into the dorms during New Student Orientation, talked about upcoming tests and spent her free time with friends.

Azia Kim allegedly climbed through this first-floor window in Okada to sleep during spring quarter. The 18-year-old was evicted after her ruse was uncovered Monday night.

The only problem is that Azia Kim was never a Stanford student.

Kim, an 18-year-old from Orange County who graduated from Fullerton’s Troy High School, lived in Kimball throughout fall and winter quarter. She lived in Okada, the Asian-American theme dorm, until Monday night, when University staff finally caught onto her ruse.

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I always knew that this was possible, given how lax security is on college campuses. I just didn’t think someone would actually carry this through! Now let’s hope Stanford doesn’t over-react in its response.

I am a big proponent of colleges having “open classrooms”. By that I mean, anyone who wants to attend class, whether a student or not, should be allow to attend. The students are really paying for the diploma anyway. Afterall, colleges are suppose to spread knowledge and produce our next generation of leaders, why not let those who want to learn.. learn?

Unfortunately, Azia Kim went overboard when she decided to move into University Housing. Her “roommate” is actually pretty cute:

But seriously, how do you not know something is amiss.. when she’s going through windows every day.

Still, Kim had neither a Stanford ID nor a key, forcing her to sneak into meals and enter her room through its window, which overlooked the Munger construction pit, the Wilbur parking lot and a dumpster, three feet off the ground. Zhou never noticed, as she spent nearly all her nights in her boyfriend’s room.

The Stanford Daily later posted another article poking fun at the situation. There’s some prized quotes in this one as well.

Dear Ms. Azia Kim . . .

I tip my hat to you. Many of us actual Stanford students read your story in awed delight yesterday, but I for one saw through the carefully orchestrated deceit to the underlying genius of your plan. You are an American heroine for managing to pull a fast one on so many of us who considered ourselves the best and the brightest. Turning lemons into lemonade — or rather, I should say, a free college education — is no easy feat, but you, Ms. Azia Kim are a mastermind, deserving to be ranked up there with Frank Abagnale and D.B. Cooper as one of the greatest con artists of the 20th century.

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The only drawbacks to your plan were the potential ramifications for your roommate from Okada — her parents just found out that their daughter was sleeping with her boyfriend so much that she practically wasn’t even in the room they were paying for. Oy. I know my parents would kill me. I can’t even imagine what hers will do to her.

…

That . is . just . priceless .

UPDATE: Since someone asked, here‘s the PDF copy of “Dear Ms. Azia Kim” from Google Cache, since the actual article got taken down.

UPDATE 2: It seems like the Stanford Daily didn’t completely take down Dear. Ms. Azia Kim, but rather updated the article with the new title “Dear Ms. Kim“

I am a huge fan of Stephen Colbert’s “The Colbert Report”. For more than a year now, Stephen Colbert had been able to “shock and awe” his guests with outrageous comments and antics. Last night however, Jane Fonda completely turned the table on him. As soon as the interview started, she got up and sat on Stephen Colbert’s lap and began to fondle him. I am not sure whether to be amused or disgusted. On one hand, seeing Stephen Colbert completely flustered for once is just priceless. On the other hand, a 69 year old woman fondling a man is just quite disturbing. You can judge for yourself:

In other news, Paris Hilton has been sentenced to jail for drunk driving! In a move that is characteristic of an attention whore, Paris Hilton has started a petition online to get herself pardoned.

Paris Hilton is calling on her fans to help her stay out of jail – by endorsing an online petition they can sign. The desperate socialite, who was sentenced to serve 45 days in jail last week after violating terms of her 2006 drink-driving arrest, has teamed up with a pal called Joshua to urge fans to help her.

In a post on her MySpace blog, Hilton, who is also asking California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger to pardon her, writes, “My friend Joshua started this petition. Please help and sign it. I love you all!” The petition, which is addressed to Schwarzenegger, claims “the American public who support Paris are shocked, dismayed and appalled by how Paris has been the person to be used as an example that drunk driving is wrong. She provides hope for young people all over the US and the world. She provides beauty and excitement to (most of) our otherwise mundane lives.

If the late former President Gerald Ford could find it in his heart to pardon the late former President Richard Nixon after his mistake(s), we undeniably support Paris Hilton being pardoned for her honest mistake as well.”

Hilton is due to start serving time by June 5 if her appeal fails, after being sentenced at a hearing at Los Angeles Superior Court on Friday.

http://www.imdb.com/news/wenn/2007-05-09/#3

Seriously, wtf? I for one, am signing this petition.

To: California Judicial System

Paris Hilton is a spoiled useless whore, and the world would be far better off if she were just left in jail indefinitely, or perhaps sent to Iraq just to see what happens.
Sign this petition if you think 45 days in jail is too light a sentence for being a vacuous waste of carbon.

Sincerely,

The Undersigned

http://www.petitiononline.com/kphij/petition.html

Everyone talks about globalization these days. The US economists are furious over our increasing trade deficit, while blue collar workers are screaming bloody murder over illegal immigration and outsourcing. Even hackers are going global on their brute force attacks!

…
vcsa (206.132.218.244): 2 Time(s)
webalizer (206.132.218.244): 2 Time(s)
xfs (206.132.218.244): 2 Time(s)
helen (206.132.218.244): 1 Time(s)
joe (206.132.218.244): 1 Time(s)
karen (206.132.218.244): 1 Time(s)
mark (206.132.218.244): 1 Time(s)
mysql (88.191.34.83): 1 Time(s)
rodica (206.132.218.244): 1 Time(s)
root (88.191.34.83): 1 Time(s)
…

Rodica??? Seriously, how many people name Rodica do you know?!